Life is one of the most challenging terms to define. In order to give a definition, it needs to be linked with application of it. It is not just a word or a theory that we sit and hypothesize or philosophy the meaning of it. Rather, to claim the definition, one needs to have the application of living it out loud the claim.  And there is a need to show it to us what it means by the way the claimant lives. When I think of it, I always filled with questions that who can be a good example that I can get a definition of it with the right application of the definition without distortion. It had been a biggest challenge of my life which I didn’t get any definition for it at the time. I’m joyful that I finally found the definition of life from the one who lives out loud and give a definition with full undistorted application. Even though, I finally managed to get the definition of life with its application, yet I still struggle to follow that path. Having many definition of life around me with many ways for their claims with the huge challenge that catalyzing it i.e. the desire of me- My interest of enjoying me than anything else. It became difficult for my path. In any case I know where I can cling into in such a struggle and I’m hopeful to win the battle at the end of the day through the grace that is granted for me from the one who redefine my definition of life.

Even though I lived a short life compared to many out there, in such a process of a life’s struggle to keep up the good fight for my life’s definition and from my desire of me, I learn a lot and will keep learning. One of the big lessons that I took from life is that-Life has two faces called CONFUSION and FRUSTRATION.

CONFUSION

In life, tomorrow is important in order to live and also arrange today. In such a process, when you find out that all the roads will take you wherever you wanted to go, you got confused. It is because one have many options to go for yet unable to see tomorrow’s single road-since there are many out there and it is known that one can't go on the many roads. I have to choose one road where I wanted life to deal me with. A road where it takes me to the place I wanted to be able to experience my life by using my talent and gift; a place where I feel secure in terms of achievement. A road that is exactly what I wanted in life to be able to run, jog or walk so that I can be who I can be as my creator created me.

I always got stuck with confusion that even though I have many option in life. I’m grateful that I have options to pick. My problem is that I’m unable to pick one; all of them seem to be a good fit for me. Standing here today, I can see myself in all of the roads. That is where I couldn’t walk an inch let alone run into it. I’m okay that I have options but I’m confused which one to pick. Even if I’m happy that I don’t have to be trapped there, yet I need HELP! I have to cry out. Again, the problem with seeking help is that, people that I ask for help able to see what they think is good for me. Therefore, they try to pick one for me rather than showing me the pros and cons of each road.  This is the tricky part of HELP.

One thing that I learn is that, ask people who are able to lead their life not just people who are struggling with many life’s questions. I’m not saying looking for the perfect people, which we will end up in none. Rather go for the least help seekers advice, yet don’t buy all the advice! Again, I’m confident that we have the perfect help in life. The one who redefine my life is able to show me the one road out of the many. I need to seek for the guidance to see a single road out of the many. Having the advice from those people and giving time for ourselves in meditating all the options, we need to cry out LORD! Help me!

FRUSTRATION

On the other hand, Life needs to go on right, as I said before, tomorrow is important, yet when you are unable to see the existence of the roads that your life needs to move on, you become frustrated to face tomorrow’s single road-since it seems doesn't exist and you know that without a road you can't go. It’s the time where you got stressed out in order to sort out your way for life. You got depressed that you don’t have any one, no one understands me and no one is there to help.

I always stuck when I couldn’t see that I can move on. There is no road that can help me drive my life to the place where I want to be, to my dream and to my plans. It is way deadly than anything else on earth so far. It crippled me, it made me unwanted, it drove me almost to insanity. I didn’t see anything, I didn’t have road to go, and I felt worthless. Finally, I have to cry out for help or got depressed and kill myself. Again, the problem with looking for help is that, people can be able to tap my back and say, keep pushing, it will be alright! I’m not sure at the time, if that is going to be alright. I needed a light, who can be able to show me the road that I couldn’t be able to see and walk on it. I stuck! Again, I need to look for people who passed through such a state of life in their journey that was able to see my situation and gave me advice. Seek their best advice, not their suggestions of why don’t you do this or that. Again, I’m glad that there is a help from the one who can be able to redefine my life’s definition. I needed to take the advice and take time by myself to seek for the guidance from the LORD to see a single road out of anything. Cry out –LORD!

One season comes with confusion and the other season comes with frustration. For each season, the lord is the only might rescuer indeed. Again it’s also a matter of maturity on how to handle our confusion and frustration that make us move. It is not the lack of one or the abundance of the other. Yet, the one who is able to look for a balance of the two is the one who gets the key to life. That is what the lord teaches us to be enduring in the suffering of life which is frustrating and to seek for enough at the time of abundance which creates confusion. In both season of life, I learnt that I have to keep going by seeking his face and do as we are told to do by the lord.

Many options and no options are part of life’s journey which needs a constant communication with the one who give our life’s definition. Sisters and Brothers, it’s part of life’s season, so keep pushing until that day!